Feeling Funky (Not in the good way)
5/12/2025
Mystical Musings
I know I’m not alone in this, but lately I’ve been feeling deeply overwhelmed—emotionally drained, disconnected, and stuck in what can only be described as a “funk.” If you’re reading this newsletter, you’re likely aware that we’re living through a time of powerful energetic ascension. And yet, it’s hard to fully grasp that truth when everything around us seems to be unraveling. From political unrest and war to racism and systemic injustice, the old paradigms of patriarchy, control, and fear are being pushed into our collective awareness more intensely than ever.
At the same time, I can feel myself awakening to new layers of spiritual insight. I’m beginning to understand this reality in more expansive ways, and learning how to reclaim my energy and inner sovereignty. This is the paradox of ascension: while the world appears more divided and chaotic, something deeper is also unfolding—an inner alignment with unity, compassion, and a growing desire for collective healing.
Living in this world of duality—light and shadow, right and wrong, left and right—can feel confusing and contradictory. And yet, ascension is teaching us to move beyond these polarities and recognize our interconnectedness. It’s a process of realizing how our individual energy affects the whole, and how collective healing begins within. Never before has the contrast between spirit and matter, between the seen and the unseen, felt so pronounced.
The New Train Track
Kryon, a light-being channeled by Lee Carroll, has given the analogy that humanity exists on a train track. But, as history was always repeating itself, the track was circular, and never deviated from that which had come before. Until now, that is. We are no longer going in the same circle of old energy, repeating all the things we’ve already done. As Kryon states (video below): “The human race as a whole is starting to move toward a lighter reality…a brighter, more aware reality.” We collectively decided to jump to a new track - one that’s being created as we speak.
But this new track that we’re on can seem scary - it brings up feelings of uncertainty and fear within us. The world feels different and we don’t yet know how to exist on this new track. Kryon elaborates: “You get up in the morning and you think something is off. The routine may be the same, but it's almost like you're waiting for…the other shoe to drop. That's an expression that means you don't know what's next, but you expect it not to be good.” This feeling, however, is in the old, tired energy of the circular train track.
Remember, we chose this new track. And it’s a bumpy ride, at least in the short term. This is not something that God or the Universe chose for us or did to us. This was our sovereign choice. We have chosen the light over the dark energy of the past, and therefore, we should expect good things to come. As Kryon said, there may be difficulties awaiting us, and it may take some doing for the old energy and its ways to get with the program, so-to-speak. “There are the old ones—the old energy ones, the greedy ones—who fight. They want the old energy to remain. They want you on that circle again…They cannot look up into the light because they are filled with dark. That is their decision. That is who they are.” And you, as a consciously awakened point of light in this world, must embrace and radiate the light, because that is who you are.
The Paradox
The ‘paradox of life’ refers to the numerous contradictions and counterintuitive truths that shape human experience and reality.
As we move through this phase of ascension, we’re being asked to navigate a profound paradox—the experience of duality on the physical plane, even as we awaken to the truth of our infinite spiritual nature. Paradoxes like this can be disorienting, yet they also hold the potential to empower us. When we sit with them, question them, and explore them deeply, they often reveal hidden wisdom and insight. I feel this paradox acutely in my own life: while the outer world may seem increasingly dark and chaotic, I simultaneously feel more spiritually awake and aligned than ever before.
This ascension journey—the “new track” we’re stepping onto—is not a gentle ride. It asks us to confront our deepest fears, not to be consumed by them, but to become fearless through them. As more light comes in, it illuminates what within us still resonates with the old world: outdated beliefs, stagnant emotions, unconscious patterns. These must rise to the surface so they can be acknowledged and released.0 The paradox is clear—our enlightenment depends on our willingness to explore the darkness within.
And no, this path is not paved with rainbows and fairy dust. It demands a real and sometimes raw inner reckoning. We're being called to level up—on a soul-deep level—often facing aspects of ourselves we’ve long ignored, suppressed, or buried across lifetimes. But there is wisdom in embracing these uncomfortable truths. Now is not the time to shrink away from the work. What we heal within ourselves, we help to heal within the Collective.
As the vibration of Collective consciousness rises, the shadow rises with it. As Gabi Kovalenko notes in her video (linked below), many in the Unawakened Collective are resisting their own sovereignty. In doing so, they fall into a state of victimhood—believing they are powerless, that they have no agency to change their reality. This disempowerment fuels division and isolation, reinforcing the illusion of separation and the belief that we must fend for ourselves alone.
But Kovalenko offers a powerful reframe: every negative experience, every challenge, is an invitation—a doorway—to deeper alignment. When we begin to see negative polarities not as punishment, but as lessons pointing us back to love, peace, and empowerment, duality itself becomes a teacher. Through pain, we discover the path back to wholeness. Through contrast, we rediscover unity.
So here we are, collectively standing at a crossroads. Do we continue to give our power away, remaining at the mercy of external forces? Or do we reclaim our sovereignty, choosing to thrive in alignment with truth, light, and conscious creation?
Changing Reality
“If you change any assumption about reality, reality immediately shifts.”
— Gabi Kovalenko
Regardless of what is happening in the world around us, we hold the key to our own happiness. Due to the constant exposure to old programming and limiting beliefs, many of us continue to “exist in an altered state of consciousness which is keeping [us] small, weak, and victimized,” as Gabi Kovalenko puts it. But here’s the shift: when we make the conscious choice to step outside the confines of that old energy, we open the door to true freedom.
You are the creator of your reality. And by choosing to confront the shadows within your own consciousness, you are not only transforming your personal experience—you are helping to transmute part of the collective unconscious. The act of exploring your own darkness is also an act of reclaiming your light.
We are not separate. Every step you take toward healing and awareness ripples outward, contributing to the awakening of the Collective.
In Conclusion
This is the moment to remember who we are—not just as individuals navigating uncertainty, but as conscious creators and contributors to a new Earth. Yes, the path of ascension is filled with paradoxes, challenges, and shadow work, but it is also filled with unprecedented potential. Each time we choose awareness over fear, presence over dissociation, and love over separation, we help to anchor a higher vibration into the Collective field. The old track is behind us; the new one is being built with every empowered thought, every healed wound, and every act of courage. We are not here to passively witness this transformation—we are here to embody it. So keep showing up, even when it’s hard. Keep choosing light, even when the dark is loud. And above all, trust that your inner work matters more than you can imagine. Together, we are the shift.
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Spiritual Practice
Restore a Sense of Safety: Getting Back Into the Ventral Vagal State
Journal Prompts
What does “feeling safe” mean to me? What does it look, sound, and feel like?
When in my life have I felt most safe? What contributed to that feeling?
Who (or what) helps me feel grounded and secure? Why?
What small things can I do each day to create a sense of safety in my body or space?
Are there places, people, or habits that currently make me feel unsafe or overwhelmed? What boundaries might help?
As an example, I have stopped listening/watching news stories as much as I used to. I notice that I feel overwhelmed the more bad news I hear.
How can I speak kindly to myself when I feel triggered or vulnerable?
Exercises
Create a “Happy” playlist: In Spotify, YouTube, or wherever you listen to your music, create a playlist with only the tunes you find most joyful and uplifting. What songs never fail to get you in a good mood? Listen to this playlist any time you feel that you feel that you are in a freeze state, shut down, or numb to the world around you. Don’t forget to sing along and move your body!
Try these affirmations, or create some of your own that feel right to you:
“I know that as a child withdrawing kept me safe but now I’m an adult I’m safe here and now. I can solve this problem by facing it.”
“I am safe. I am capable.”
Begin a gratitude practice: Write down 3 things you are grateful for every evening before you go to sleep, or first thing in the morning. This will help you focus on the positive in life.
Give yourself grace and compassion. Sometimes we just get worn down, and that’s ok! Allow yourself to mourn and feel sad and process the hurt so that you can move through it and come out on top.
“I am safe” affirmation & sound healing:
Good Reads
“Navigating the Plateau of Spiritual Ascension”
